Hey guys,
Recently I gained a new perspective in life I wanted to share. This year I became more open to connecting with new people and at the same time started to see the people close to me for who they really are. I realized I was surrounding myself with toxic people. People who always came to me when they needed help or guidance but was never there for me when I was down. It seemed like I was always trying to make these people happy but the problem is, when your always trying to make everyone else happy , you yourself will never be happy.
When your constantly surrounded by people who only spread negativity and insecurities you begin to become really negative and insecure too. It was then that I realized that the people I surrounded myself with were emotionally draining the life out my me and for my own sake I needed to distance myself from these Toxic people and instead surround myself with people who brought out the best in me.
SPOTING TOXIC PEOPLE
1. " ITS ALWAYS ABOUT ME "
One trait about Toxic people is that they like to talk about themselves , everything always has to be about them. They might ask you questions like ' how was your day?' but once you start answering They are already looking at their nails. Its clear that they don't genuinely care about what you have to say and instead they're just waiting for you to ask THEM how their day was so they can talk about whatever's going on in their lives. If your friend only talks themselves and never really asks you any questions , you might want to evaluate the friendship.
2. INSECURITIES ARE STATED OUT LOUD
Toxic people are extremely insecure with themselves. They often care too much about what other people think of them because they are not confidant with themselves. They're insecurities and doubts are often said out loud : "omg i feel fat" "I am ugly"etc. They always insult themselves for other people to reassure them "no your not fat". On the other hand some toxic people think too highly of themselves and tend to look down on others. This false confidence also translate into insecurity.
3. CONSTANTLY SPREADING NEGATIVITY
We all have that one friend in your group of friends thats a "party pooper", the person thats kills the vibe. I know most of the time you'll try to uplift this friend but if your friend is constantly complaining about something or in a funky mood for no reason I suggest you don't waste your time or energy trying to change them.
4. LOVE FOR GOSSIP
They participate in gossip because they enjoy bringing other people down to make themselves feel better. If you have a friend who loves to talk smack about other people, who's to say He/She doesn't talk about you behind your back. " Small minded people talk about other people , normal minded people talk about events, and big minded people talk about Ideas"
5. ALWAYS PLAYING VICTIM
These type of people will always find something WRONG in every situation , even when everything is going well there will be a problem. You simply can't reason with Toxic people because they like to play the victim in every situation and can't seem to reflect on their own fault doings or take any responsibility for the situations they keep on putting themselves in.
6. CONTROLLING & MANIPULATIVE
If there is a person in your life that is super controlling and/or manipulative wether its a close friend, Lover, or family member you need to cut them out. For example, if you have a very controlling mother that likes to control every aspect of your life, you shouldn't justify her actions with "but she only wants the best for me" or "she just wants to help", sure she may not have any bad intentions but you need to grow some confidence to refuse to do what you actually don't want to do. Grow strong enough to walk away from people who treat you like shit because you know you deserve better.
HOW TO DEAL WITH TOXIC PEOPLE: 3 EASY STEPS
1. SIMPLY CUT THEM OUT
If you have identified some toxic people in your life, you simply need to cut them out of your life. Ok I get it, thats easier said then done. But honestly ask yourself Are these people bringing out the best in me? or are they giving me unnecessary stress that restrains me from living a more fulfilling life. If its a toxic friend your dealing with, slowly DISTANCE YOURSELF FROM THEM and once they know they are no longer your priority they might find someone else to spread their negativity towards. Toxic Family members might be a little more tricky if you live with them but you can still find ways to distance yourself from them by spending more time with yourself.
2. WORK ON YOURSELF
A great way to distance yourself from people is to become extremely busy. You can get a new job or find a new hobby, something that will keep you so busy you won't even have TIME to deal with any toxic people. Once you start to distance yourself from toxic people start spending more time working on yourself. Evaluate everything you want to change in your life and take action to change them.
3. SPEND MORE TIME WITH PEOPLE WHO INSPIRE & MOTIVATE YOU
Once you have spent enough time by yourself developing a stronger identity, you can start surrounding yourself with people who inspire you and motivate you.
SOME SITES THAT I RECOMMEND :
#1 .
#2 .
#3
